Spider Click Bait

Normally, I avoid all click bait, simply because I am in fact a sucker for click bait. I check the weather in the morning, and fifteen minutes later BuzzFeed has told me which Ninja Turtle I am (Raphael), which Disney Prince I’m destined for (Flynn Rider), and what color my aura is (inconclusive, which I take to mean I’m too awesome for auras in general). But the strange and unusual always catches my eye, and recently I bit on an article about the 25 most terrifying spiders (from a pet website of all places, but that’s a different story).

I’m not afraid of normal spiders in general. Sure, I don’t like it when I’m doing laundry and they take me by surprise and leap out of a pile of panties, but in general I keep out of their way and they keep out of mine.  Of course I benefit from not living in Australia or any other part of the world where aggressive venomous spiders actually chase you, so that is a factor. But then I came across the camel spider:

Watch out, he spits.

 Sometimes also called a wind scorpion:

He disembowels with all the colors of the wind.

Even though it’s neither a spider nor a scorpion. While Google has a more accurate representation of the creature in question, LiveScience gives the hard facts. LS tried to soften the harsh reality of the camel spider by assuring me that it doesn’t actually leap into the air to disembowel camels and soldiers indiscriminately, but they failed pretty spectacularly. Especially when they get to the point about how the carnivorous buggers can run after their prey at 10 miles per hour.

So what began as a quick lark about creatures I’m not normally afraid of ends with the knowledge of a spider that runs faster than I can. And now I know it.

Why do I do this to myself?

(sxc.hu: teslacoils, davidallag, &  emmelemma)